I am a woman born 1949 and my quest is to find a mindmate
to grow old together as a mutually devoted couple
in a relationship based upon the
egalitarian rational commitment paradigm
bonded by intrinsic commitment
as each other's safe haven and secure basis.

The purpose of this blog is to enable the right man
to recognize us as reciprocal mindmates and
to encourage him to contact me:

The entries directly concerning,
who could be my mindmate,
are mainly at the beginning.
If this is your predominant interest,
I suggest to read this blog in the same order
as it was written, following the numbers.

I am German, therefore my English is sometimes faulty.

Maybe you have stumbled upon this blog not as a potential match.
Please wait a short moment before zapping.

Do you know anybody, who could be my mindmate?
Your neighbour, brother, uncle, cousin, colleague, friend?
If so, please tell him to look at this blog.
While you have no reason to do this for me,
a stranger, maybe you can make someone happy, for whom you care.

Do you have your own webpage or blog,
which someone like my mindmate to be found probably reads?
If so, please mention my quest and add a link to this blog.

Thursday, September 23, 2010

81. Pegs and Holes

Pegs and Holes

I like the metaphor of the pegs and the holes.   

There is a lid for every pot.  There is a hole for every peg or a peg for every hole.    But then there is the problem of the square peg and the round hole.    It sound like a very simple problem.    But on further scrutiny, it becomes much more complex, when considering the material and the relative size.
There can be pegs, of which the diagonal is bigger than the diameter of the hole.   By forcing it in, the part that is of softer material, gets damaged.    Criminals are like steel pegs damaging the vulnerable society.   There are also the marginalized people, who are the wooden pegs getting damaged when forced into the steel hole of a merciless society.

But there are also other square pegs with a diagonal not bigger than the diameter of the round hole.   The peg can be inserted without any damage, but it does not fit, with the least movement, it just falls out.   Imagine a peg with a head like a nail, that covers it, and the peg looks as if it would fit, even though it does not.   There are countless holes, wherein the peg looks as if it would fit, but it doesn't.  That is the kind of peg, that I am.  

I got this feedback:  "I get the feeling when I read your blog that you do not tolerate people who don't fit your ideal."    I would not tolerate and accept a man as a partner, who is in any fundamental way different from my ideal.  But this has nothing to do with my general attitude towards people.  The world is full with people, who are different, they are everywhere, they are my neighbours, people at my job, or anybody I would meet at any leisure event.   I can and I do mix with them, but I feel more or less detached and alienated.    I do not need to look for them, and I need even less to write a blog to get in contact with any of them.   

Therefore this blog is putting all emphasis on how I consider myself as different.   Let the whole world around think that I am a round peg with a head in a round hole.   On this blog, I am a square peg, and I want to show it.   Finding my mindmate is this blog's only purpose.   If on the way I get in contact with any woman friend, who shares some of my basic attitudes, this would just be an extra benefit.