Procreation and Cognitive Dissonance
Sometimes there are thoughts, that are so obvious, that they should have occurred to me but just did not, until I read them elsewhere.
I got this link via a childfree people's mailing list:
http://healthland.time.com/2011/03/04/why-having-kids-is-foolish/print/#ixzz1G2uk2Puc
This articles explains the attitude of parents glorifying and redefining raising children as a rewarding experience and their denial of all the unpleasantness by their attempt to avoid cognitive dissonance.
This is obvious and logical. I have been explaining some behaviors before by the avoidance of cognitive dissonance. Yet it somehow did not occur to me to apply it to procreation.
But there are some more implications to the attempts of resolving cognitive dissonance:
The choice to procreate is an irreversible decision. Once people have children, they are doomed to raise them or at least to pay for them to be raised and taken care of. They cannot attempt to cope with all the disadvantages of raising children and after a few years decide, that it is enough and time to get rid of the burden.
The choice to procreate is also not experienced as an individual choice. Breeders consider themselves as normal, as doing the only right thing. They do not consider it as a choice with an alternative, but as their determined purpose in life. They glorify breeding not only for themselves, they also firmly believe this to be true for everybody else. Also they glorify breeding as being heroes by doing a sometimes unpleasant duty.
Therefore breeders are not free to fully resolve their cognitive dissonance by reconsidering the decision, their only option is to glorify breeding. Resolving the cognitive dissonance does not mean, that they can really convince themselves that changing stinking napkins is a joyful and rewarding occupation in itself. All they can do is repress and deny themselves the full awareness of the true amount of this unpleasantness and glorify instead the fulfillment of an alleged duty. Therefore their cognitive dissonance cannot really be resolved, only reduced.
Would they allow themselves to feel fed up with their children and regretting to have them, they would feel guilty and ashamed. Instead they project their guilt and shame on all those people, who declare that they do not want children. When breeders attack the childfree with anger, it is the anger at the repressed own regret of breeding not being as rewarding as it appears in their conscious glorification.
Sometimes there are thoughts, that are so obvious, that they should have occurred to me but just did not, until I read them elsewhere.
I got this link via a childfree people's mailing list:
http://healthland.time.com/2011/03/04/why-having-kids-is-foolish/print/#ixzz1G2uk2Puc
This articles explains the attitude of parents glorifying and redefining raising children as a rewarding experience and their denial of all the unpleasantness by their attempt to avoid cognitive dissonance.
This is obvious and logical. I have been explaining some behaviors before by the avoidance of cognitive dissonance. Yet it somehow did not occur to me to apply it to procreation.
But there are some more implications to the attempts of resolving cognitive dissonance:
- The behavior causing cognitive dissonance can be either an individual and personal decision or a general behavior.
- The decision can be reversible or irreversible.
The choice to procreate is an irreversible decision. Once people have children, they are doomed to raise them or at least to pay for them to be raised and taken care of. They cannot attempt to cope with all the disadvantages of raising children and after a few years decide, that it is enough and time to get rid of the burden.
The choice to procreate is also not experienced as an individual choice. Breeders consider themselves as normal, as doing the only right thing. They do not consider it as a choice with an alternative, but as their determined purpose in life. They glorify breeding not only for themselves, they also firmly believe this to be true for everybody else. Also they glorify breeding as being heroes by doing a sometimes unpleasant duty.
Therefore breeders are not free to fully resolve their cognitive dissonance by reconsidering the decision, their only option is to glorify breeding. Resolving the cognitive dissonance does not mean, that they can really convince themselves that changing stinking napkins is a joyful and rewarding occupation in itself. All they can do is repress and deny themselves the full awareness of the true amount of this unpleasantness and glorify instead the fulfillment of an alleged duty. Therefore their cognitive dissonance cannot really be resolved, only reduced.
Would they allow themselves to feel fed up with their children and regretting to have them, they would feel guilty and ashamed. Instead they project their guilt and shame on all those people, who declare that they do not want children. When breeders attack the childfree with anger, it is the anger at the repressed own regret of breeding not being as rewarding as it appears in their conscious glorification.
