I am a woman born 1949 and my quest is to find a mindmate
to grow old together as a mutually devoted couple
in a relationship based upon the
egalitarian rational commitment paradigm
bonded by intrinsic commitment
as each other's safe haven and secure basis.

The purpose of this blog is to enable the right man
to recognize us as reciprocal mindmates and
to encourage him to contact me:

The entries directly concerning,
who could be my mindmate,
are mainly at the beginning.
If this is your predominant interest,
I suggest to read this blog in the same order
as it was written, following the numbers.

I am German, therefore my English is sometimes faulty.

Maybe you have stumbled upon this blog not as a potential match.
Please wait a short moment before zapping.

Do you know anybody, who could be my mindmate?
Your neighbour, brother, uncle, cousin, colleague, friend?
If so, please tell him to look at this blog.
While you have no reason to do this for me,
a stranger, maybe you can make someone happy, for whom you care.

Do you have your own webpage or blog,
which someone like my mindmate to be found probably reads?
If so, please mention my quest and add a link to this blog.

Tuesday, March 1, 2011

251. The Resilience and Willpower Battery

The Resilience and Willpower Battery

This is a metaphor and not a claim of any kind of mystic woo-woo power.

People are born with a fully charged resilience and willpower battery.  

Resilience means the passive ability to endure phases or events of stress, being hurt, being depreciated, being lonely, loss, failure, fear and danger, emotional abuse, helplessness and other inclemencies of life without detrimental effects.

Willpower (as already mentioned in entries 134 and 136) is the ability to have self-control and actively force oneself to do unpleasant things and to resist unwanted impulses.     

Resilience and willpower use the energy from the battery.   When the battery is empty, the person reaches a state, that is known as burn-out.     Usually burn-out is considered as job related problem, but it can be as much be the result of an unhappy private life.

There are many ways to recharge the battery, depending on the personality.   But for most people, a happy relationship is an especially potent method to recharge it, it is a power charger.   

A committed couple, being a safe haven for each other, based upon trust, caring, reliability and responsibility, can strengthen each other in their shared coping with the world around them.   

But commitment and perceiving themselves as a unit is the precondition for a relationship to be a recharger for the battery.    When people fight to get their needs met, they deplete the battery at least as much as they recharge it.    Even worse, when a jerk dominates a woman, then he recharges his battery by emptying hers until she reaches the burn-out.  

Therefore it is my quest to find a mindmate, with whom there will be commitment, which enables us to mutually charge our batteries.