I am a woman born 1949 and my quest is to find a mindmate
to grow old together as a mutually devoted couple
in a relationship based upon the
egalitarian rational commitment paradigm
bonded by intrinsic commitment
as each other's safe haven and secure basis.

The purpose of this blog is to enable the right man
to recognize us as reciprocal mindmates and
to encourage him to contact me:

The entries directly concerning,
who could be my mindmate,
are mainly at the beginning.
If this is your predominant interest,
I suggest to read this blog in the same order
as it was written, following the numbers.

I am German, therefore my English is sometimes faulty.

Maybe you have stumbled upon this blog not as a potential match.
Please wait a short moment before zapping.

Do you know anybody, who could be my mindmate?
Your neighbour, brother, uncle, cousin, colleague, friend?
If so, please tell him to look at this blog.
While you have no reason to do this for me,
a stranger, maybe you can make someone happy, for whom you care.

Do you have your own webpage or blog,
which someone like my mindmate to be found probably reads?
If so, please mention my quest and add a link to this blog.

Friday, November 4, 2011

435. Mate Selection, Dishomeostasis And The Pleasure Center

Mate Selection, Dishomeostasis And The Pleasure Center

This continues entries 431 and 434.   

Behavior is generally motivated by a combination of physical dishomeostasis, emotional dishomeostasis, physical stimulation and non-physical stimulation of the pleasure center.   I am convinced that the relative predominance of each of these forces depends upon innate differences between hedonistic and Epicurean brains.  
Animals react immediately to perceiving dishomeostasis and to the recognition of possible stimuli for the pleasure center.  Human cognition allows people to choose between either an immediate reaction or delayed gratification and stimulation.   The memory of past experience allows the anticipation of enhanced stimulation in the future.
Dishomeostasis impedes or diminishes the stimulation of the pleasure center in both humans and animals.   But it does not impede the humans' general knowledge of what they are able to experience as stimulation of the pleasure center.   Even while under the pressure of dishomeostasis, they are capable to ascertain future control over stimuli without immediate attraction.   They act in anticipation of the future and as part of long term goals.  
Dishomeostasis causes an urge for immediate action.   The stimulation of the pleasure center allows the conscious choice between different stimuli according to individual preference and depending on the circumstances.

The mating strategy follows this more general description.  Proactive behavior to find a mate is usually and mainly triggered by the perception of instinctual dishomeostasis.  The state of sexual dishomeostasis triggers the male to approach a female, who is driven by her own dishomeostasis of the procreation instinct to accept him.   
But humans can also consciously initiate the mating process in the absence of physical dishomeostasis.   They are able to consciously choose the most suitable partner.  In this case the mating strategy is based upon long-term anticipation of the best mutual stimulation of the pleasure center according to individual preferences.   

There are several constellations of what determines the male selection of a female:
  1. Male animals choose a mate by instinct only for the immediate restoration of physical homeostasis.

  2. Promiscuous jerks are like animals, they are only driven by their immediate urge for physical homeostation.   But they have the cognitive ability to anticipate the additional stimulation of the pleasure center as a side effect of restoring homeostasis.  Therefore they choose the female body most appealing to their instincts.

  3. Hedonistic men's choice of a mate is determined by the same instinctive urge for immediate homeostation.  They too choose the body evoking the strongest infatuation.   But they prefer to continue the use of the same body as long as the infatuation lasts.  Their choice is also guided by the anticipation of the availability, which they prefer over recurrent hunting for new prey.   But they will replace the chosen body, as soon as it seizes to stimulate the pleasure center.

  4. Monogamous men experience their need for physical homeostasis and the physical stimulation of the pleasure center as the decisive reason to get involved in a relationship.  But they are also aware, that homeostasis and physical stimulation is not sufficient for happiness.   They choose a mate by long term thinking.  They anticipate also the important non-physical stimulation of their pleasure center.   The choice of the mate is influenced by both partner's personality, which determines their individual preferences of physical and non-physical stimulation of the pleasure center.  

  5. Epicurean men are guided predominantly by long-term thinking.   Their choice of a mate is at least as much influenced by emotional dishomeostasis like emotional end intellectual loneliness as by physical dishomeostasis.   They choose a companion in anticipation of non-physical stimulation of the pleasure center like intellectual intimacy.    The concept of self-arranged commitment is attractive to them.   The Epicurean principle of not harming and not being harmed includes to avoid causing emotional dishomeostasis as a form of harming a person.   Therefore the monogamous epicurean man selects a mate also by the criterion, that he is able to cause her as little emotional dishomeostasis as possible.