I am a woman born 1949 and my quest is to find a mindmate
to grow old together as a mutually devoted couple
in a relationship based upon the
egalitarian rational commitment paradigm
bonded by intrinsic commitment
as each other's safe haven and secure basis.

The purpose of this blog is to enable the right man
to recognize us as reciprocal mindmates and
to encourage him to contact me:

The entries directly concerning,
who could be my mindmate,
are mainly at the beginning.
If this is your predominant interest,
I suggest to read this blog in the same order
as it was written, following the numbers.

I am German, therefore my English is sometimes faulty.

Maybe you have stumbled upon this blog not as a potential match.
Please wait a short moment before zapping.

Do you know anybody, who could be my mindmate?
Your neighbour, brother, uncle, cousin, colleague, friend?
If so, please tell him to look at this blog.
While you have no reason to do this for me,
a stranger, maybe you can make someone happy, for whom you care.

Do you have your own webpage or blog,
which someone like my mindmate to be found probably reads?
If so, please mention my quest and add a link to this blog.

Wednesday, November 9, 2011

439. Communication And The Meaning Of Words

Communication And The Meaning Of Words

Communication can only work, when the receiver of spoken or written text subjectively receives the same message as was meant by the sender.     One reason for distorted communication is the implicit discrepancy concerning the exact meaning of the words used.  

Language is flexible.    People only share a common fuzzy meaning of the words they use, but they often differ in the exact and subtle meaning.    Dictionaries can only standardize a basic and fuzzy meaning of words.   Sometimes people are unaware of using words differently and of the resulting misunderstandings.
  • When a language and its vocabulary is used by many people, this leads to differences in the subjective meaning of words.   
  • The meaning of words changes over time.   Novels written 150 years ago bear enough examples.   
  • There are regional differences between native speakers.    
  • When a language like English is used as a second language by many people, their understanding of the meaning of words is even more fuzzy and different due to the influence of their native languages.  

There cannot be a right or wrong decision about one exact meaning of a word as carved in stone.   When people get caught in an argument about the only correct exact meaning of a word, this sometimes keeps them from ever discussing the content, that the words were meant to convey.  

Words are only the raw material of communication.   When a dyad or a limited number of people communicate, they can create new words and agree on the meaning or one person can create a word and inform the others of the meaning.    This enables them to communicate successfully between themselves, even when others cannot participate.   

Communication does not depend on one absolute meaning of the words used.   It only depends on the awareness, how the sender of the message uses the word.  
Personally I am more interested in communicating than in agreement about the meaning of words,  Therefore I like this as a workable strategy for discussing any topic:   
The sender of a written or spoken message first defines, how he uses ambiguous words.   The receiver or reader processes the message by using the given definition.    This allows both to communicate, even when they do not agree on the exact meaning of the words.