Emotional Cheating
If a jerk or an emotional moron accepts not to cheat, he does this, because it is such a common simple rule, that even he can understand, that he risks to loose the woman and therefore the control over his commodity. But an emotional moron often has no clue about the meaning of emotional cheating and the boundaries of discretion and exclusivity.
In entry 253 I described, how an emotional moron can be someone, who is his only one-man-ingroup, and everybody is outgroup, no matter what social roles they have, and that a woman in his life also is outgroup. He may share with her the bed and the roof, but other than that, he does not value or perceive her as someone special, with whom he would share exclusive intellectual and emotional bonds, of which the rest of the world is excluded and which is protected by discretion.
The behavior of the emotional moron depends upon his general level of trust. He may be so distrusting, that he refuses to share his innermost feelings and the truth about his motives even with his partner. I described, what happens in this situation in entry 297 about The Backlash of Not Trusting.
The emotional moron often has no perception for boundaries and the subtle differences of social roles. He does not know, whom to keep how much emotional distance of. He lacks any sense of discretion and tells to outsiders details of the relationship, that he owes to his partner to keep private. He does not even bother to inform her or to ask her permission before his indiscretions. He is violating her trust and this is a form of betrayal. It is emotional cheating, when he shares details of his relationship with other women. He commits a transgression.
When he tells private details to a third party in her presence, she at least has the chance to correct wrong impressions by adding her own point of view.
But if a man tells others about their private life without her knowledge, then she is prone to meet his friends or acquaintances, being oblivious of what he has told them and what wrong ideas they have about her. She meets people, with whom he has ruined her reputation with onesided accounts of conflicts and she cannot correct it.
A couple's life needs to be kept discreetly from all outsiders. If an intrinsically committed partner tries in vain to communicate with a bonding disabled other, and she is in so much distress, that she needs support, then she may have no choice but to confide in a close friend, but this is only acceptable as an exception from the rule of exclusivity.
Emotional morons are a hazard to a woman in many ways.
If a jerk or an emotional moron accepts not to cheat, he does this, because it is such a common simple rule, that even he can understand, that he risks to loose the woman and therefore the control over his commodity. But an emotional moron often has no clue about the meaning of emotional cheating and the boundaries of discretion and exclusivity.
In entry 253 I described, how an emotional moron can be someone, who is his only one-man-ingroup, and everybody is outgroup, no matter what social roles they have, and that a woman in his life also is outgroup. He may share with her the bed and the roof, but other than that, he does not value or perceive her as someone special, with whom he would share exclusive intellectual and emotional bonds, of which the rest of the world is excluded and which is protected by discretion.
The behavior of the emotional moron depends upon his general level of trust. He may be so distrusting, that he refuses to share his innermost feelings and the truth about his motives even with his partner. I described, what happens in this situation in entry 297 about The Backlash of Not Trusting.
The emotional moron often has no perception for boundaries and the subtle differences of social roles. He does not know, whom to keep how much emotional distance of. He lacks any sense of discretion and tells to outsiders details of the relationship, that he owes to his partner to keep private. He does not even bother to inform her or to ask her permission before his indiscretions. He is violating her trust and this is a form of betrayal. It is emotional cheating, when he shares details of his relationship with other women. He commits a transgression.
When he tells private details to a third party in her presence, she at least has the chance to correct wrong impressions by adding her own point of view.
But if a man tells others about their private life without her knowledge, then she is prone to meet his friends or acquaintances, being oblivious of what he has told them and what wrong ideas they have about her. She meets people, with whom he has ruined her reputation with onesided accounts of conflicts and she cannot correct it.
A couple's life needs to be kept discreetly from all outsiders. If an intrinsically committed partner tries in vain to communicate with a bonding disabled other, and she is in so much distress, that she needs support, then she may have no choice but to confide in a close friend, but this is only acceptable as an exception from the rule of exclusivity.
Emotional morons are a hazard to a woman in many ways.
